Top Five Ways to Please ChoMUN Secretariat

5. Talk about how you would like to model your life (and conference) after our lives (and conference). Ask for a conference t-shirt and mug.

4. Shake the hand of the Chief of Staff. Repeatedly.

3. Explain to the CFO the proper way to use her camera. Bonus points if you tell her what she could have done better to "get the shot". Speak clearly and slowly, as she is a small brown girl, and may not understand you.

2. Ask Secretariat members where your committee room is before checking the map in your delegate guide. Not after. Before. Oh....it's directly in front of you? LOLZ.

1. Come on shake your body baby do that Conga. No, you can't control yourself any longa.

Know your peeps v.inf

Who he is: Fishman
What he does: Chairs Charles V
Physical Description: Hair, golden locks
Origin: The Bay Area
Reason for awesomeness: Dude, look at his hair (plus unlike 95% of staffers can grow facial hair)

Rocking the vote.

The DNC at work, with a clear Obama bias (A good thing).

Dinner After First Session

"I am tired of emails saying that they will cure my small penis. Because I do not have one."
-Name withheld for protective purposes.

More Fame! Northside Edition!

Name: Frances E Low.
Likes: Free market economics
Dislikes: John Maynard Keynes and his academic kin
Other dislikes: Slows, lakeshore drive's 45 MPH speed limit
Rumored secret past: Anti-labor strike breaker.

Give it to Mama

Greg Kamstra: GQ Shoot, Part 1

Bosom Buddies. 15MOF

Who are they? Matthew David Kennedy and Benjamin Andrew Field
Aww cute, they even match. It is kinda cute. They are like those kids who parents dress to match. Though if you look closely they have different tie styles. Notice that Matt's tie is a little narrower and shorter, while Ben's is longer and fatter.
Why do they like each other? Well it started when Benny was a wee little first year and Matty was a wizened second year. They were forced together by an evil empire called MUNUC. Taking an immediate liking to each other, they've been inseparable since.
Who has more success with the ladies? Does that matter when they have each other?

More Fame! Oregon edition

Who is this gorgeous man? Why it is Steven Carl Aaberg
What does he do? Coordinated Crisis Director of the Joint Coordinated Crisis between Edwardian England and Tsarist Russia.
Wow that is a mouthful! Yes it is.
Where is he from? The greatest state in the lower 48.
What state is that? Oregon, duh!
Why is it great? Well in a nutshell, everyone is chill, the grass stays green 365 days of the year (so yes the grass is greener), it isn't expensive, public transit works in Portland and there are trees and mountains!
Why is his middle name Carl? I don't know, ask him

15 min of fame. V.n+1

Name: David Grossman
Position: Crisis Director for OAS
Heritage: Columbia by way of Brooklyn by way of Westchester
Why the picture is fuzzy: Since he'd make a great character in a low-budget slasher film and the focus in such movies sucks. Plus he can be very intimidating. You should fear him.
Dislikes: Hugo Chavez, low grade rum

lone.....ranger? pirate? rodeo princess?

lone delegate

OH HAI

15 seconds of fame. v4

Who: Katherine Klein Berner
Why Featured: She begged to be featured.
Origin: Westchester County, NY
Interests: Sailing, being neurotic, not showering/washing hair, untagging pictures on facebook.

End of Day 1

It's been a long day. Many thanks to all our faithful readers in the Crisis Room and abroad